Benchcrafted's Book Of Plates Now Available

Earlier today we received the first and only shipment of our new publication "The Book of Plates, Connoisseur Edition." It was delivered in a Bugatti Veyron, Sang Noir Edition by the mayor of Shueyville, IA.

What is this book you might ask? Well, it's a reprint of Roubo's original work, "l'Art du Menuisier". We went back in time to Paris, to when I was 3 years old in Iowa, and asked Leonce Laget in Paris to give a copy to his son Jacques in Paris, and then sign it and ship it to us, from Paris, in Iowa in 2011. That all really happened, well, except for the time travel part. I do have a flux capacitor though. And it lets me sweat copper joints like there's no tomorrow (literally.)

So why would you buy our version the Book of Plates instead of the one by the Lost Art Press? A few good reasons.

1. Our's comes with words. French ones. The Lost Art Press version is pictures only. That's fine if you is illiterate. Or have the patience of a 16-year old. Or you like to use Twitter.

2. Our's is almost a foot thick. The Lost Art Press version is only 1-3/4" thick. Schwarz calls this "a sizable chunk." I'd like to see Schwarz tell that to Jack Palance.

3. You have to store our's flat. Our's is so huge you can't stand it up on edge, like the puny LAP version. That one stands at attention, like a skinny soldier waiting for orders. Our's loafs around on its own dedicated bookshelf and gives orders.

4. Ours smells musty. Like something old, but good, and vintage too (but definitely not hipster, oh no) The Schwarz version smells like pansy-banana soy ink.

5. Our's is actually printed on a press. The Lost Art Press version was made with a Mac Book Air, tethered to an Apple Newton, on top a coffee table in a (flat screen tv-less!) living room, while Schwarz sipped warm Schlitz through a straw from a red Solo cup.

6. Our's costs ten times as much as the LAP version. Sure, you could have ten copies of Schwarz's version, but that's because it's 1/10 of what our version is. Our is ten times better, literally. Yeah, its pretty much the same, but still, its ten times (10x) better. It just is.

7. Our comes with a dust jacket. LAP doesn't even give you a wooden box. Neither do we, but our's does have a dust jacket, with Plate 11 on it. Three times.

8. Our's is in French. That's awesome-ique. The LAP version isn't even in English, because it's so lame IT DOESN'T EVEN HAVE WORDS (see #1)

9. Our's actually does come in a wooden box. (see picture above) We built a special marquetry cabinet embellished with Roubo's engravings just for this book. LAP gives you cardboard. I've never seen good marquetry done on cardboard before.

Satisfied? Contact me if you'd like to buy the one and only Benchcrafted Book Of Plates.

Seriously, this is still available. For more (totally honest) info on our copy of "l'Art du Menuisier" see here.

Also, needless to say, everything about LAP's Book of Plates (which is incredible) was offered tongue-in-cheek. I personally buy everything LAP produces. Well, except for the hoodie. I quit wearing those when I hung up my parachute pants for the last time. But the books are good! The best!